Kansas Family and Divorce

Saving for an Emergency Fund

As I have mentioned here in this blog and more times than I can count to my clients, one of the areas married couples argue about is money. There are really three, money, children and the other one we won't mention. But, in my own experience, money is the one that usually causes more problems than the other two. Let me just say, I am just as guilty on this one as you are.

First of all, we don't communicate about money. We have to talk to our spouse openly about money. Both spouses should feel free to talk about their concerns and fears. And BOTH spouses should have an equal say in how YOUR money is spent, saved and invested. Remember one thing, when you got married you were two who became one. When one spouse takes total control of the money in the household and keeps the other in the dark, problems arise.

Spending, saving and investing should be done as a partnership. If done that way, fewer problems will come up. And by doing this, we take one of the causes of divorce out of the picture.

To help start the conversation going, there is a great list of things you can do to create an emergency fund. Check out 28 ways to save for an emergency fund. And talk about it.

My Debt has been Charged Off

Q: My credit report says some of my debts are “charged off”, do I still owe those debts?

A: You still owe the charged-off debt. Many people mistakenly believe a creditor does not want to collect a charged-off account. Wrong-o! A charge off is merely a bookkeeping entry. It does not affect your obligation to pay. When it becomes apparent to your creditor that you are not paying and are not going to pay any time soon, then the creditor must “charge off” the loan. Usually that happens 6 months after you default-you stop making payments on that debt. The creditor stops posting interest or late fees to the account when the loan becomes nonperforming and the creditor is not getting paid.

All defaulted debts are charged-off, then are sent to either a collection agency or sold to a debt buyer. Sometimes these debts are sold several times to investors who will try to collect the account years later. If you have charged off debts on your credit report you should include those debts in your bankruptcy case.

Source for Post: Bankruptcy Law Network

Prenuptial Agreements Can Promote Healthier Marriages

Heather Mahar of the Harvard Law School recently concluded a study in which she sought to assess whether the common perception that prenuptial agreements increase the likelihood that a marriage will end in divorce, and came to the conclusion that such agreements, if properly drafted and entered into for the right reasons, can actually increase the likehihood that the marriage will be successful. You can read more about the study here. The press release announcing the resutls of the study states that:

Mahar argues that the division of assets is ‘the least compelling reason for average American couples to consider prenuptial agreements, since most couples do not enter marriages with significant assets.’ However, she finds that ‘for couples who choose a traditional partnership, with one spouse exiting the workforce to raise children, agreeing in advance about how to divide assets earned during a marriage or potential future earnings can protect the stay-at-home spouse against divorce laws, which have generally eliminated long-term alimony.’

The process of creating a prenup acts as form of premarital counseling, making couples talk about what kind of marriage they want, and what legal ramifications there will be if one spouse veers off course.

In the study Mahar advocates mandatory prenuptial agreements. That is perhaps a radical prescription, but it is always refreshing to see the conventional wisdom aggressively challenged.

Source for post: Emediawire.com.Hat tip to Jeffrey Lalloway of the California Divorce and Family Law Blog for this post on the study.

Source for Post: Pennsylvania Family Law Blog.

Five Common Mistakes People Make When Dealing with Creditors

One of the most unpleasant parts of finance is dealing with creditors, particularly those we cannot afford to pay. Money.families.com has five of the most common mistakes people make. Take a look and consider if you are making these mistakes.

1. Avoiding the Creditor

2. Refusing to give details

3. Thinking of their creditor as an opponent

4. Playing tough

5. Not following up with the agreements they make

If you avoid these five common mistakes, your negotiations and conversations will be easier and more productive for both you and your creditor.

What is an Estate Plan?

Fellow blogger Clark Allison at a great blog, California Estate and Business Law Blog has a post called “What is an Estate Plan?”

“An estate plan is the response to many time honored sayings: Plan for a rainy day, get your ducks in a row and never leave that till tomorrow which you can do today.

An estate plan is a carefully considered plan that takes care of you and your loved ones if you become disabled and when you die. It provides for your spouse and children in the most effective and hassle-free manner upon your death. A well thought out plan will also ensure the inheritance you leave your spouse and children will be protected from divorce and lawsuits.”

Go to the link above and read the entire post. While it is provided in a blog from California, it still has some great information to think about.

Technorati Tags: Estate Planning

Top 10 Tax Breaks, On The House

Here they are:

• Mortgage Loan Interest

• Home Improvement Loan Interest

• Points

• Property Taxes

• Capital Gains Exclusion

• Home-Based Business Deduction

• Selling Costs and Capital Improvements

• Moving Costs

• Mortgage Tax Credit

• Energy Tax Credit

Source: Real Estate Update and Real Estate News and Information

Technorati Tags:
Taxes, Real Estate

Marriage and Money 101

Once again, we visit the issue of money and marriage. As I have stated before, money is one of the big three couples may argue about.

Love and money. Unfortunately, the two don't always go together. But with the wedding season in full swing, many couples will be so consumed with the details of their nuptials that they'll neglect to discuss one of the most important aspects of their new life together: money.

"Most people don't talk about finances before they get married," says Celia Ray Hayhoe, a financial planner and family financial extension specialist at Virginia Polytechnic Institute and State University. "It's the last taboo subject."

Before you tie the knot, read this primer on how to become fiscally in step with your spouse. If you've been married awhile, consider this a refresher course.

Kiplinger's.com has a pretty good article on this subject. Three areas we are reminded to look at are:

• Newlyweds: Start talking

• Resolve differences

• Create a financial union

Technorati Tags:
Marriage, Marriage and Money

Secrets to a Happy Marriage -- Part One

Here is the first in a series of what looks to be a great set of articles. This one deals with secrets to a happy marriage. They come to us from Ben Stevens at the South Carolina Family Law Blog. Ben has given me permission to provide them to you.

I am proud to present the first in an excellent series of articles, The Little Blue Book Series of Secrets to a Healthy Marriage by Rev. Dr. Trey Kuhne, LMFT. I will publish this eight part series over the next several weeks, and I hope that you find it helpful. I truly appreciate Trey's generosity in allowing me to publish this series on my blog. Here is Part One:

Probably the most frequently asked question I get in counseling from married couples and those preparing for marriage is this: Where do we get that little book that tells us how to do everything right the first time, how to stay in love, and cultivate a healthy and happy relationship? And to the surprise of all, it just doesn’t exist. I am not talking about the Bible, which is our Source of life and faith, or some little publication by Dr. James Dobson of Focus on the Family. What I am talking about is that small hypothetical little blue (instead of black) book the preacher was supposed to secretly hand over to the husband right before he says the ‘I do.’ Or perhaps, the husband’s father was supposed to pass it down from when his father gave it to him. I will assume that everyone knows what I am talking about here.

Ways to head off fights over money

In my own practice, money is one of the big three. Let's face it, couples fight, argue about, discuss or cuss about three things: children, sex and money.

The Chicago Tribune has an interesting article today about Joint financial values vital in building strong marriage. Good article with some great tips and advise. Read the entire article at the link above.

At the end of the article are some tips to avoid financial conflicts.

- Understand what drives your partner. How did money play a role in his or her parents' marriage? Does your partner see money as a means primarily to enjoyment, security or charitable giving?

- Don't saddle one spouse with all the record-keeping and another with all the spending. Ditto for investments: One partner may do the bulk of the administrative work on your investment accounts, but both need to buy into the risk tolerance and investing strategy.

- Every year, draft a spending plan that both partners agree to follow. Review it monthly so you can discuss any overspending before it gets out of hand.

- Seek formal counseling if your money fights are camouflage for much deeper problems, like secrecy or lying.

Technorati Tags:
Marriage, Finances, Debt, Credit

When I get married, will my wife gain ownership rights to my house?

QUESTION:

My fiancée has asked about putting her name on the deed to my house after we get married. I don't want to do that in case things don't work out and we divorce. But I've heard that when I marry all of my assets automatically become half hers, anyway. I should say that I will be the only one paying for the mortgage and home improvements. What does the law say, and will a premarital agreement remedy the situation?